Dear Sisters,
Blessings to each of you in Christ Jesus our Savior!
After receiving the Eucharist this Sunday, I felt the Holy Spirit move powerfully within me. My mediation started with an imagine of little-girl me sitting on Jesus' lap. I could hear his heart beating in his chest and thought about how much that poor heart had endured for us.
Next I could see a narrow windy path strewn with rocks, brambles on the side of the road. Jesus was leading me by the hand up the path. My Guardian Angel was all around me, healing the rips in my skin caused by the brambles with a wave of his translucent hand. Our Lady had a hand on my shoulder as she urged me forward and up the difficult climb. Off to the side of the road on my left, beyond the thorny bushes I could see white-robed martyrs of our faith urging me forward, imploring me not to give up. On the right the angels were silent yet so present in their witness of my journey.
My breath was coming heavily from the effort of the arduous climb. The air felt thin and my heart beat fast in my chest. Jesus turned to me with sad eyes that burned a whole in my heart and handed me an enormous cross to carry up the path. The cross was huge, many feet taller than my height with the horizontal arms of the cross reaching far out. The weight of the wood took me to my knees and nearly doubled me over. My right shoulder took the brunt of the weight and I felt great pain. I cried out to Jesus... "How Lord can I carry this all the way up the path...it is too much!" In less than a second the weight had been lifted from me. I stood before Jesus as he took MY cross onto his shoulder. He handed me a smaller cross, about two feet tall. It fit comfortably in the crook of my arm.
Before me Jesus carried the huge cross that was meant for me. He took the pain, He took the punishing weight of that cross up the path. In my arms I held the small cross that He'd given me instead. It was a cross that I could handle. It didn't slow me down in my climb although it sometimes made me awkward as I tried to find my balance on the path.
I realized that He carried all our crosses on His way to Golgotha. He took our sins and washed them clean with His own blood. How good is our God!
It also occurs to me that He gives us the crosses we can carry, while He shoulders the real weight of our sins, sorrows and disappointments. Some great saints can carry very large crosses, but little souls like mine would wither away under the suffering. He knows this and adjusts things so that I can climb the windy, narrow path to eternal life. Along the way we have our dear Guardian Angels, the great saints, the inspiration of the Holy Spirit and of course Our Lady. We also have each other for encouragement. Praise Be!
When I finally joined the mass again, I realized that I hadn't moved a muscle in a long time. It was time to take the knowledge of His immense LOVE and MERCY for each of us out to the world.
He cares so much. He loves so much. He suffers so much.
Jesus I love you and trust you! Thank you for taking my sufferings and making them your own. Thank you for your mercy.
Ladies if you hear me complaining about my little cross sometime, please remind me that He is the one carrying the full weight of my cross.
To God the Glory!
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